Being a results driven individual has it's ups and downs. Seeing results pushes me further and further. If I'm not seeing results, I don't really push. So, getting momentum going is pretty hard sometimes for me.
In my first week of regimented workouts there's already noticeable gains.
Not really, "Hey you look bigger!" but more "Hmm, my iPod holder needs to be loosened from where it was previously." Noticing the little things leads to bigger ones.
I started drinking Muscle Milk again, forgetting that the periods when I was getting strongest, I was using this product.
So that's going well, even if I haven't started a full on crossfit work out. I just don't have the equipment necessary to do get into it the way I would want. In the mean time I'm using my mom's church's gym. It's more than adequate for a basic workout routine.
Only about five days into my "not thinking about things that bring me down", or whatever you want to call it, and it's working like a charm so far. There have been a couple times where I've started to get upset or annoyed and just stopped whatever I was doing. The same goes for not storing things up.
It's been a great week emotionally and mentally after a pretty shoddy weekend.
However, I've been less than %100 productive this week in regards to both the website and simple.ology. I got a good amount of work done Monday and started to learn something new Tuesday, but that's really been about it.
I'm finding that I'm mostly productive during the day, even if it's just helping out around the house or some such, but when night comes around I'm just killing time like always. Granted, I do play poker mostly at night. So that's one good thing.
But I need to budget my productivity so that I don't think, "Well, I worked pretty hard today, I can take the night off." Getting a job will help this I think. Because in order for me to be productive on the things I want to do, I'll have to work on them at night when I get home.
Just a quick update for today, we're going to the beach today for Shrimp Fest, should be a fun weekend.
Hasta.
Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts
Friday, October 10, 2008
Monday, October 6, 2008
Strengthening/Weakening Decisions
I had a terrible weekend. Saturday night I was so depressed and lonely I encouraged the dog to sleep in my bed.
The cat too.
I hate cats normally.
Sunday wasn't as bad, more of a fall out from the night before. But I didn't get anything done.
One of the staples of simple.ology is the Power Praxes. This is a system of evaluating what makes you stronger and what makes you weaker. I'll talk more about the simple.ology part later, but about how I can relate that to my mental state now.
The basic idea is that you look at a decision and think: "Will this make me stronger or weaker?" It's simple. If it's something that makes you weaker, you don't do it. If it makes you stronger, you do.
Simple.
I realized this morning I can apply that to my emotional state as well. I can't say specifically what started my downturn Saturday night. But I know that I was feeling lonely. I have to start paying close attention to my emotions and whenever they start slipping, I have to ask myself, "What is making me feel this way, specifically?"
And then stop whatever it is.
I know it's not a perfect solution. It's like a weed. You know that unless you get the roots it's going to grow back. But I don't yet know how to get at the roots. They're encased in lead or something. So until I figure that out, I have to keep chopping at what I can get at.
The more I do practice this train of thought, the easier it will be the next time and the next time and the next time. Until eventually, I won't think twice about doing the things that make me stronger and cutting out the things that make me weaker.
It definitely isn't perfect, but they're steps that will lead me to perfection, however small they may be.
Baby steps!
The cat too.
I hate cats normally.
Sunday wasn't as bad, more of a fall out from the night before. But I didn't get anything done.
One of the staples of simple.ology is the Power Praxes. This is a system of evaluating what makes you stronger and what makes you weaker. I'll talk more about the simple.ology part later, but about how I can relate that to my mental state now.
The basic idea is that you look at a decision and think: "Will this make me stronger or weaker?" It's simple. If it's something that makes you weaker, you don't do it. If it makes you stronger, you do.
Simple.
I realized this morning I can apply that to my emotional state as well. I can't say specifically what started my downturn Saturday night. But I know that I was feeling lonely. I have to start paying close attention to my emotions and whenever they start slipping, I have to ask myself, "What is making me feel this way, specifically?"
And then stop whatever it is.
I know it's not a perfect solution. It's like a weed. You know that unless you get the roots it's going to grow back. But I don't yet know how to get at the roots. They're encased in lead or something. So until I figure that out, I have to keep chopping at what I can get at.
The more I do practice this train of thought, the easier it will be the next time and the next time and the next time. Until eventually, I won't think twice about doing the things that make me stronger and cutting out the things that make me weaker.
It definitely isn't perfect, but they're steps that will lead me to perfection, however small they may be.
Baby steps!
Monday, September 22, 2008
Planning Makes Perfect: Depression (Part 2 of 5)
I first realized something was seriously wrong when I found myself suffocating myself with my pillow until it hurt my lungs, wanting that badly to stay in bed.
It wasn't the first time I'd done it. I can't say how many times I'd done it, just that it wasn't the first.
Another clue was when I was driving home for the weekend and I had to physically fight the urge to let go of the wheel almost any time I would see a curve coming up on the road.
The prospect of flying off the road to see what would happen, not to kill myself (aside from a time when I was a teenager, I've been largely averse to dying), was one of the few things that got my adrenal glands pumping those days.
This all took place my first and only semester at Auburn University. My depression had peaked for several reasons: I missed my friends in Austin, I was alone in Auburn, I was drinking heavily, I was smoking marijuana frequently, I hated the classes I was in, I wasn't good at making friends, and the list goes on.
Needless to say I wasn't in the best environment and I left before Thanksgiving.
Since then, it's come and gone. Mostly come. There have been a few periods in the last couple years that I haven't been dealing with it on some level. Oddly, the one that I can really quantify is just after my grandmother's death. A time when I should have plummeted. That's something I'll dissect later.
Since March of this year, my depression has steadily been making a come back. Beginning with a dysfunctional relationship and peaking two weeks ago, when I just wanted to leave Austin and not have to be responsible for what I was anymore.
In only a week it's gone largely into remission. The only times I feel particularly bad are times when I feel particularly lonely, but I can forget about those times nearly as easily as they come.
The reason, I believe, is because I'm becoming more and more happy with where I'm at and what I'm doing. I'm taking action on the problems I see in my life and being productive with my goals for the first time in a long time, possible for the first time ever to this extent.
Despite the progress I've already made, it isn't lasting. I haven't undergone the complete mental reconfiguration to make it permanent.
Unfortunately this isn't a step I can quantify. I don't think I'll really be able to post my progress on it, but all the same:
Make a conscious effort every day to be happy with where I'm at and all that is right in my life.
A more physical step I plan on taking is to begin taking medication. Technically, dietary supplements, but I'm always one for calling a spade a spade.
I'm going to drive to either Tallahassee or Birmingham (I'm thinking Birmingham so I can hit up the Whole Foods while I'm there) to see a physician to be tested and begin taking products from a company called NeuroScience, on the recommendation of friend who speaks very highly of the company and process.
I tried taking medication right after leaving Auburn and hated it. It was Lexapro, and instead of feeling better, I felt nothing. I was completely emotionally dead. I wasn't happy or sad or any range in between.
The problem with many antidepressants, is that the pill is basically a cocktail of ingredients. They contain varying amounts of whatever ingredient, but it isn't specialized. Rarely is the first dosage the right one and it's months and visits and pills later that the desired result is felt. Even once a dosage that works is found, that doesn't mean it's without things that aren't needed.
It's pretty commonly accepted that the chemical cause of depression is due to an imbalance of neurotransmitters. Specifically, the monoamine neurotransmitters norepeniphrine, dopamine, and seratonin.
The problem occurs when the chemicals don't travel from the presynaptic neuron to the postsynaptic neuron correctly. Either staying in the synaptic gap for too long, causing to postsynaptic neuron to fire off continuously (as is the case of cocaine, on the dopamine receptors), not producing enough of the chemical to correctly stimulate the postsynaptic neuron, or the chemical not staying in the synaptic gap long enough.
The majority of antidepressants are selective seratonin reuptake inhibitors, or SSRIs. Their goal is to keep the seratonin in the synaptic gap longer, thereby stimulating the the postsynaptic neurons longer.
This is all well and good, except they largely don't account for the effects and needs of the other neurotransmitters. Whether the drug's intent or not, they still affect the dopamine and norepeniphrine receptors.
The difference with the NeuroScience products, is that you're tested before you take anything for what levels are lacking or excessive. So, the different medications that are prescribed to you, are catered to your specific need. And it's not one "cure all" drug either, there are different medications for different needs, so you're getting exactly what it is you need.
So, that is my current game plan to treat my depression. I'm hoping the neurotransmitters won't have the same effect as my past attempt at medicating myself, which I believe it won't. And I can't forget the power of creating a positive environment to be in. As sappy as it sounds, reminding myself daily how amazing my life is and how fortunate I am.
It wasn't the first time I'd done it. I can't say how many times I'd done it, just that it wasn't the first.
Another clue was when I was driving home for the weekend and I had to physically fight the urge to let go of the wheel almost any time I would see a curve coming up on the road.
The prospect of flying off the road to see what would happen, not to kill myself (aside from a time when I was a teenager, I've been largely averse to dying), was one of the few things that got my adrenal glands pumping those days.
This all took place my first and only semester at Auburn University. My depression had peaked for several reasons: I missed my friends in Austin, I was alone in Auburn, I was drinking heavily, I was smoking marijuana frequently, I hated the classes I was in, I wasn't good at making friends, and the list goes on.
Needless to say I wasn't in the best environment and I left before Thanksgiving.
Since then, it's come and gone. Mostly come. There have been a few periods in the last couple years that I haven't been dealing with it on some level. Oddly, the one that I can really quantify is just after my grandmother's death. A time when I should have plummeted. That's something I'll dissect later.
Since March of this year, my depression has steadily been making a come back. Beginning with a dysfunctional relationship and peaking two weeks ago, when I just wanted to leave Austin and not have to be responsible for what I was anymore.
In only a week it's gone largely into remission. The only times I feel particularly bad are times when I feel particularly lonely, but I can forget about those times nearly as easily as they come.
The reason, I believe, is because I'm becoming more and more happy with where I'm at and what I'm doing. I'm taking action on the problems I see in my life and being productive with my goals for the first time in a long time, possible for the first time ever to this extent.
Despite the progress I've already made, it isn't lasting. I haven't undergone the complete mental reconfiguration to make it permanent.
Unfortunately this isn't a step I can quantify. I don't think I'll really be able to post my progress on it, but all the same:
Make a conscious effort every day to be happy with where I'm at and all that is right in my life.
A more physical step I plan on taking is to begin taking medication. Technically, dietary supplements, but I'm always one for calling a spade a spade.
I'm going to drive to either Tallahassee or Birmingham (I'm thinking Birmingham so I can hit up the Whole Foods while I'm there) to see a physician to be tested and begin taking products from a company called NeuroScience, on the recommendation of friend who speaks very highly of the company and process.
I tried taking medication right after leaving Auburn and hated it. It was Lexapro, and instead of feeling better, I felt nothing. I was completely emotionally dead. I wasn't happy or sad or any range in between.
The problem with many antidepressants, is that the pill is basically a cocktail of ingredients. They contain varying amounts of whatever ingredient, but it isn't specialized. Rarely is the first dosage the right one and it's months and visits and pills later that the desired result is felt. Even once a dosage that works is found, that doesn't mean it's without things that aren't needed.
It's pretty commonly accepted that the chemical cause of depression is due to an imbalance of neurotransmitters. Specifically, the monoamine neurotransmitters norepeniphrine, dopamine, and seratonin.
The problem occurs when the chemicals don't travel from the presynaptic neuron to the postsynaptic neuron correctly. Either staying in the synaptic gap for too long, causing to postsynaptic neuron to fire off continuously (as is the case of cocaine, on the dopamine receptors), not producing enough of the chemical to correctly stimulate the postsynaptic neuron, or the chemical not staying in the synaptic gap long enough.
The majority of antidepressants are selective seratonin reuptake inhibitors, or SSRIs. Their goal is to keep the seratonin in the synaptic gap longer, thereby stimulating the the postsynaptic neurons longer.
This is all well and good, except they largely don't account for the effects and needs of the other neurotransmitters. Whether the drug's intent or not, they still affect the dopamine and norepeniphrine receptors.
The difference with the NeuroScience products, is that you're tested before you take anything for what levels are lacking or excessive. So, the different medications that are prescribed to you, are catered to your specific need. And it's not one "cure all" drug either, there are different medications for different needs, so you're getting exactly what it is you need.
So, that is my current game plan to treat my depression. I'm hoping the neurotransmitters won't have the same effect as my past attempt at medicating myself, which I believe it won't. And I can't forget the power of creating a positive environment to be in. As sappy as it sounds, reminding myself daily how amazing my life is and how fortunate I am.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Breaking it down
I started to get ahead of myself with another post. Delving into the self help like I'd already completed my reformat, forgetting that I'm just starting. I'll save it for later.
So what am I going to do?
The first step is to decide what it is I need to fix.
Firstly, I want to get a hold of my depression.
This has been a noticeable problem since high school, maybe even as early as middle school; I just didn't see it for what it was then. Truly, I didn't have any concept of what it meant to be depressed until my junior year of high school.
Despite being painfully aware of my dilemma, I have done little to rectify it. At least in absolute terms. I've done things to treat the symptoms: surrounding myself with people who force me to be social, trying new things to keep me stimulated, loving the people around me; but nothing to treat the disease.
For a time, this worked. The fall and winter of '07 was definitely the happiest time of my life. But being the fastest turtle I can be isn't saying much when I should be running like a cheetah.
I can't say exactly what I was doing that made me happier. The main thing I can think of that was different is that I wasn't particularly worried about anything. I put the troubles I was having deciding where my life was going on the shelf and focused solely on being happy with where I was at.
I think this is in itself an important aspect of mental health that I need to get back to:
To be happy with where I'm at.
That's not to say to be stagnant, like I was last fall. But to be happy with the progress I've made, even if I'm not quite where I want to be. And understand that, while I'm not quite where I want to be, I'm more than capable of getting there. Regardless of what it is I want to do.
Next:
I want to increase my productivity.
I'm terrible at staying productive. I operate in spurts in which I'll work like a fiend and then lose interest and my production slowly falls to nothing. I think this may be because I don't work on projects that truly capture my attention. Things that I like as a concept, but once I begin realize I don't really care for them in practice.
Another reason, is that I'm terrible at instituting any sort of habit. I never studied regularly, never stuck to cleaning schedules, bills are a nightmare, sleep comes and goes when it wants. As such, I'm never one to say "I'm going to do x on this day, y on this day, and z on this day," and stick to that schedule. My productivity suffers greatly when I can't maintain a schedule.
This past winter and spring, I had a regimen at the gym that I stuck to like clockwork. Mondays and Fridays I would climb with my weight vest and lift with more weight, focusing on strength, while on Wednesdays I would climb vest free and lift a lesser amount, focusing on stamina and technique. As a result, I saw greater strength gains than I had at any point in my life.
Get to the point where my own productivity motivates me.
Not only was I sticking to a strict workout schedule, but I was thoroughly enjoying climbing. I was loving having people compliment me on my body for the first time in my life, showing people up on the wall, and looking great. The motivation perpetuated itself.
This brings me to my next goal:
Get physically healthier.
I'm not in the worst shape in the world. But far from where I'd like to be. If I had a dollar for every time I became uncomfortable when the topic of weight came up around women I wouldn't have to worry about my next goal. I'm really self conscious about my weight, as most people are, only opposite. I feel guilty for having something most people really want (but don't really try to acquire) when I don't want it. When you've been told you're partly responsible for an eating disorder, you really can't help but not like it. I'm that skinny.
At the moment, I'm 5'10"-5'11", 135 pounds. I'm skinny. I'm weak. I'm not happy with it. I would like to gain 10 pounds of muscle. Which, while it will be difficult, it is certainly doable. I almost said I would be happy with gaining 5 pounds, but that would be a lie. I still wouldn't be satisfied.
Gaining 10 pounds wouldn't put me at very big weight, still in the Junior Welterweight class according to International Boxing Federation standards. But I think it'll put me at a really healthy weight. I would look very lean and trim, but not emaciated, which is my ideal body type. If I find that I still look really skinny at this weight, I'll reassess it then. But I can't really see that being the case.
It won't just be working out that I need to do, but also eating healthier. I've never eaten the best. Afraid of trying new foods, I shied away from many vegetables and most fruits until recently. But I'm finally opening up my palette, trying new dishes, even when my gut tells me, "You're going to hate this." I'm finally able to make logical decisions about what I eat, because I'm not afraid of foods anymore.
I'm not sure what my diet is going to be. I've been practically starving the last couple months, and being home only two days it feels amazing to not have to suppress an appetite and eat to my heart's content. For the time being, I'm going to focus on quantity over quality. Not ignoring the things I put into my body, but not being overly strict about it.
Soon, I'm going to implement some hybrid form of the MaxDiet, my friend Tynan's creation. And though it's a bastardization of one of the cornerstones, I'm 90% sure it's going to include meat. I'll do my own research and come up with something that I think will be either better or on par. If I find that I won't be able to manage it without significantly reducing the quality of my diet, I may go all MaxDiet.
Yes, I, Matthew Cordova, am considering becoming a vegetarian. You heard it here first and for those of you who know me know just crazy that sounds. Even to me.
I'm that serious about what I'm doing here.
Get in my ideal physical shape, through diet AND exercise, not one or the other.
My final major goal:
Become financially stable.
That's vague. I know. But what exactly I want is vague equally vague at this point. This is the biggest question mark for me right now. This also encompasses the broadest spectrum of things (though maybe not more than my mental health). What do I want to do to make money now, six months from now, a year from now, 30 years from now? I just can't say definitively.
What I want from money, long term, big goal, end all be all of making money, I think is very different than what most people want. At least it's very different than what we're lead to believe most people want, as far as society is concerned (I'll have more on this at some point).
I don't want to be rich. That is not my goal. If it takes that to reach my goal, so be it. What I want is to be comfortable. Not making vast sums of money that lead me to buy things that I don't need, but cause me to need even more money to pay for it all. I want to make a little more money than I need to pay for the things I want to do. Enough to cover the range of my expenses but still enough to save a decent amount for a rainy day.
I think too often people don't account for that rainy day that is bound to happen. I know I don't. I see that I've got extra money in my bank account and I spend it on new shoes or a video game. I don't think about the car that may need a new transmission sometime soon. I don't think about how I'm not always the safest person and that I very well could break my leg on any given day.
It's things like that that I also want to think about all the time. Budget out my expenses and what I need to keep under my bed. Really take the time to plan out my money the way I never have, but how everyone needs to.
Come up with a financial plan. Not just for making money, but spending it as well.
So, those are the major things I want to work on during this reformat. In the coming days I'll talk about how I expect to accomplish each of these goals. I've already began several systems for some of my goals, with more in mind. Some will be experimental and of my own design (this blog is one of them), some will be things I've heard about through the grapevine and I'll be testing them out on my own. Those I'm testing I'll review to help those who read in whatever they may want to accomplish. I won't be afraid to scrap something if it's not working or if I found something better. It's an experiment to say the least, but it's going to be a fruitful one.
-Dova
So what am I going to do?
The first step is to decide what it is I need to fix.
Firstly, I want to get a hold of my depression.
This has been a noticeable problem since high school, maybe even as early as middle school; I just didn't see it for what it was then. Truly, I didn't have any concept of what it meant to be depressed until my junior year of high school.
Despite being painfully aware of my dilemma, I have done little to rectify it. At least in absolute terms. I've done things to treat the symptoms: surrounding myself with people who force me to be social, trying new things to keep me stimulated, loving the people around me; but nothing to treat the disease.
For a time, this worked. The fall and winter of '07 was definitely the happiest time of my life. But being the fastest turtle I can be isn't saying much when I should be running like a cheetah.
I can't say exactly what I was doing that made me happier. The main thing I can think of that was different is that I wasn't particularly worried about anything. I put the troubles I was having deciding where my life was going on the shelf and focused solely on being happy with where I was at.
I think this is in itself an important aspect of mental health that I need to get back to:
To be happy with where I'm at.
That's not to say to be stagnant, like I was last fall. But to be happy with the progress I've made, even if I'm not quite where I want to be. And understand that, while I'm not quite where I want to be, I'm more than capable of getting there. Regardless of what it is I want to do.
Next:
I want to increase my productivity.
I'm terrible at staying productive. I operate in spurts in which I'll work like a fiend and then lose interest and my production slowly falls to nothing. I think this may be because I don't work on projects that truly capture my attention. Things that I like as a concept, but once I begin realize I don't really care for them in practice.
Another reason, is that I'm terrible at instituting any sort of habit. I never studied regularly, never stuck to cleaning schedules, bills are a nightmare, sleep comes and goes when it wants. As such, I'm never one to say "I'm going to do x on this day, y on this day, and z on this day," and stick to that schedule. My productivity suffers greatly when I can't maintain a schedule.
This past winter and spring, I had a regimen at the gym that I stuck to like clockwork. Mondays and Fridays I would climb with my weight vest and lift with more weight, focusing on strength, while on Wednesdays I would climb vest free and lift a lesser amount, focusing on stamina and technique. As a result, I saw greater strength gains than I had at any point in my life.
Get to the point where my own productivity motivates me.
Not only was I sticking to a strict workout schedule, but I was thoroughly enjoying climbing. I was loving having people compliment me on my body for the first time in my life, showing people up on the wall, and looking great. The motivation perpetuated itself.
This brings me to my next goal:
Get physically healthier.
I'm not in the worst shape in the world. But far from where I'd like to be. If I had a dollar for every time I became uncomfortable when the topic of weight came up around women I wouldn't have to worry about my next goal. I'm really self conscious about my weight, as most people are, only opposite. I feel guilty for having something most people really want (but don't really try to acquire) when I don't want it. When you've been told you're partly responsible for an eating disorder, you really can't help but not like it. I'm that skinny.
At the moment, I'm 5'10"-5'11", 135 pounds. I'm skinny. I'm weak. I'm not happy with it. I would like to gain 10 pounds of muscle. Which, while it will be difficult, it is certainly doable. I almost said I would be happy with gaining 5 pounds, but that would be a lie. I still wouldn't be satisfied.
Gaining 10 pounds wouldn't put me at very big weight, still in the Junior Welterweight class according to International Boxing Federation standards. But I think it'll put me at a really healthy weight. I would look very lean and trim, but not emaciated, which is my ideal body type. If I find that I still look really skinny at this weight, I'll reassess it then. But I can't really see that being the case.
It won't just be working out that I need to do, but also eating healthier. I've never eaten the best. Afraid of trying new foods, I shied away from many vegetables and most fruits until recently. But I'm finally opening up my palette, trying new dishes, even when my gut tells me, "You're going to hate this." I'm finally able to make logical decisions about what I eat, because I'm not afraid of foods anymore.
I'm not sure what my diet is going to be. I've been practically starving the last couple months, and being home only two days it feels amazing to not have to suppress an appetite and eat to my heart's content. For the time being, I'm going to focus on quantity over quality. Not ignoring the things I put into my body, but not being overly strict about it.
Soon, I'm going to implement some hybrid form of the MaxDiet, my friend Tynan's creation. And though it's a bastardization of one of the cornerstones, I'm 90% sure it's going to include meat. I'll do my own research and come up with something that I think will be either better or on par. If I find that I won't be able to manage it without significantly reducing the quality of my diet, I may go all MaxDiet.
Yes, I, Matthew Cordova, am considering becoming a vegetarian. You heard it here first and for those of you who know me know just crazy that sounds. Even to me.
I'm that serious about what I'm doing here.
Get in my ideal physical shape, through diet AND exercise, not one or the other.
My final major goal:
Become financially stable.
That's vague. I know. But what exactly I want is vague equally vague at this point. This is the biggest question mark for me right now. This also encompasses the broadest spectrum of things (though maybe not more than my mental health). What do I want to do to make money now, six months from now, a year from now, 30 years from now? I just can't say definitively.
What I want from money, long term, big goal, end all be all of making money, I think is very different than what most people want. At least it's very different than what we're lead to believe most people want, as far as society is concerned (I'll have more on this at some point).
I don't want to be rich. That is not my goal. If it takes that to reach my goal, so be it. What I want is to be comfortable. Not making vast sums of money that lead me to buy things that I don't need, but cause me to need even more money to pay for it all. I want to make a little more money than I need to pay for the things I want to do. Enough to cover the range of my expenses but still enough to save a decent amount for a rainy day.
I think too often people don't account for that rainy day that is bound to happen. I know I don't. I see that I've got extra money in my bank account and I spend it on new shoes or a video game. I don't think about the car that may need a new transmission sometime soon. I don't think about how I'm not always the safest person and that I very well could break my leg on any given day.
It's things like that that I also want to think about all the time. Budget out my expenses and what I need to keep under my bed. Really take the time to plan out my money the way I never have, but how everyone needs to.
Come up with a financial plan. Not just for making money, but spending it as well.
So, those are the major things I want to work on during this reformat. In the coming days I'll talk about how I expect to accomplish each of these goals. I've already began several systems for some of my goals, with more in mind. Some will be experimental and of my own design (this blog is one of them), some will be things I've heard about through the grapevine and I'll be testing them out on my own. Those I'm testing I'll review to help those who read in whatever they may want to accomplish. I won't be afraid to scrap something if it's not working or if I found something better. It's an experiment to say the least, but it's going to be a fruitful one.
-Dova
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